Bullet Message LEFT FOR REF

I don’t know why I’m here anymore. I don’t know why I’m doing this. I really don’t even see a point. What am I trying to accomplish by continuing to be here? If I stay, people hate me. I don’t accomplish anything. If I do nothing, nothing changes. Things are constant. People continue in their ways of thinking. And if I leave? Perhaps that is my escape. But how selfish of me. Could I? I don’t know.
I’m lost. So, so lost. I’m so confused; maybe I don’t even know why I continue this silly routine. Perhaps I want to know. Answers, yes, those would be nice. I would be lying if I said that dissecting my purpose in staying in the position of leadership I have here wouldn’t bring me some satisfaction. So, let us go.
Let’s explore the abyss of loneliness and confusion.

I. Purpose

I used to be productive. I used to make hundreds of edits a day. But no, those days have gone. Those days have gone and are never going to come back! I’m an admin. I’m an admin because I’ve done enough work to be considered a hard worker for the wiki. But that’s just it, I’m not! I don’t help the wiki! I hardly edit, I hardly contribute, I hardly even check in anymore!
So why am I still here? Is it so that I can give an opinion on every forum thread? Is it so I can be pestered to do work that I inevitably will not do? Is it so that I can continue to feel the guilt of being a non-retired admin whilst hardly doing any work for this wiki? I don’t know. Maybe?
Sometimes this really gets to me. Sometimes it bothers me, really bad. This can get to me enough, in fact, to where I go on rapid editing sprees across many articles. I gnome away, working simply to fill a cache in the recent changes. This is disgusting. I cannot fill a purpose that I know is defined by an era of my activity that lays in the distant past, years and years in the past.
This cannot be it, though. Perhaps, gradually, this is a sign of me losing my connection with the wiki.
Still, this is gradual. The change of heart I’m feeling now is sudden. It’s not the result of some effect that has been very long and prominent over a great stretch of time. However, I feel like I don’t have a purpose. If I stay here, the wiki gets a few more gnome edits from me. There will always be gnomes though, as many as there are potential vandals.
Something else, then. But what?

II. Dedication

I don’t have it. I used to have it, and now I don’t. What am I dedicated towards? Hmmm, let’s see. College, music, other commitments, etc. I don’t have the time anymore to squeeze editing into my daily schedule, or hardly my weekly schedule. Even just idling on the Chat has proven to be a distraction. I quite honestly have to get off of Chat for several days if I need to focus on several projects at once.
There are new people coming in with dedication. There are forums and blogs that constantly provoke arguments and useless discussion, those alone show me that editors care about this place and the series. The wiki is still in good ha—

What am I saying? Okay, these two sections are pointless monologuing. Let’s get to the meat of things.

III. “Kyle Hate Club”

You never died, did you? Even after you forced me out of this wiki before, this metaphorical coalition of users still loves to gather around the campfire, roast marshmallows, and talk about how much they despise Bullet Francisco. God, we hate him. I so hope he loses his adminship. I hate the way he runs this place.
I will be referencing other users for probably the rest of this section. I will not use a professional referencing system because I think that’s dumb and I don’t want to.
How sad is it that a community claiming to be working together to not only create an encyclopedia, but also to facilitate fandom and friendship among fans and editors will so publicly crucify someone behind their back? How disgusting. A community that I have belonged to for long is perhaps the greatest hypocrite of all, then, in that the discussions they host which represent their wiki go against their very mission. An encyclopedia will never be created this way. Heck, a community will never even be united this way! How can you expect to do anything with such mud-slinging, friendly fire, and abuse in the community, with nothing done about it? I must say, as an admin who technically isn’t supposed to see all of the logs I receive, I feel it to be unethical and just as immoral as the community to take action myself against a personal attack against yours truly.
Is this a community I shall involve myself in any longer? No. Never again. For the rest of this discussion, let’s look at some individual examples.

• [Anonymous] and I think I speak for all of us when I say, a demotion for Bullet would be the greatest Christmas/Hanukkah/whatever present of them all.
• [Anonymous] Kyle is a f*cking jerk
• [Anonymous] Kyle is an *sshole who think he can do whatever he wants

What a wonderful thesis topic to a discussion to slander my name as an admin. I think it’s just great that the community’s hatred for me is so grand that it can even be casually coupled with a diction fit for the holidays! Merry Christmas, Kyle Hate Club! Happy Hanukkah, Kyle Decimators! A great Kwanza to you, united Kyle abhorrers of the world! Oh, and might I add that two of the three above messages were made by my fellow administration team?
But seriously, ya’ll, this community loathes me. I can’t even keep myself from beginning to discuss how obvious his detesting of me is and how public he makes it. Also, yes, I just used “ya’ll.” Sue me.

• [Anonymous] I see how it was a personal attack towards you [Bullet], and I admit that's one thing that I wanted it to be. The night the forum was made, confusions were being made on the chat due to the rules, and Myself123 asked us where the rules came from. Spyro and Free said that you [Bullet] told them, and it was then when Myself123 advised us to gather up and make a forum where we would be able to clear up the rules. I went because I wanted to make sure Free and Spyro didn't mess up, and the three of us, Spyro, Free, and I, went on XAT. The majority of that night was insults being hurled towards you [Bullet]. We hardly made any progress.
• [Anonymous] Bullet is the worst user to ever come to the SNN

These are them! THESE are the leaders of the larger community! THESE are the ones who are going to have the greatest influence on the combined community! THESE people, the ones who so publicly will slander a member of the collective staff! THESE people, the ones who will preach for fairness and against bullying terms and swearing but yet so openly will deface another user without thought or hesitation! YOU WANT THEM TO BE LEADERS? You want slanderous, mud-slinging users who show signs of a freeness and will to easily deface and talk down to other users to be the prime examples and symbols of the already broken community? HAH! I cannot help but literally LAUGH at the lack of BASIC LOGIC AND CHARACTER involved in this! Hah! Haha!
How disgusting. How pitiful.
I, Bullet Francisco, administrator and bureaucrat of the Sonic News Network and hated outcast, sincerely declare my absolute disapproval of these users continuing to possess leadership position.

IV. Individuals

In case it is not clear by now, this is my declaration of leaving forever. I will never edit this wiki again after this and God willing, I will never look at either website with these two eyes during my lifetime again. However, during my time spent with the Sonic News Network over the past three years, I’ve met many individuals. Hundreds of people, perhaps even thousands. I have interacted with the trolls, the admins, the gnomes, and the vandals. Want to know a secret?
If you’re reading this, I probably hate you.
I loathe so many, many people I have met on this wiki. Isn’t that sad? Perhaps being on the same wiki with some of the same people for three years has made me a very critical person. Wikis do that to you; they train you to be precise and detail-oriented, as well as extremely critical.
However, a couple of especially pretentious jerks have stood out in these years of my life as particularly terrible people. I think it’s time now that I give my full opinion on these individuals now, because I refuse to leave in silence. You all hate me, of those listed below, and I will never forgive you. You have skewed forums I have created, publicly defaced me, given me false apologies and promises of kindness. I hate you all. I hate every single one of you and you shall never receive any acceptance from me for the way you have treated and abused me.

1. Shadowunleashed13.

Shadowunleashed13, I’m going to be blunt. You are an idiot. You are perhaps even more oblivious than I am in that you honestly thought that I didn’t know that you hated you. Pathetic is what you are, hiding in the community that is a home to your hatred because you don’t have even the mealiest ounce of courage to face me. Any time we ever have had a “heart-to-heart” moment, a few things have held true. Firstly, you are completely pretentious. You try too hard to please everyone. I see right through you. Secondly, you were a disgustingly pitiful liar. You are pitiful. How disgusting is a life form when they cannot even complete the simple task of making a truthful statement after so many tries?
I’ve known you hated me. I know you still loathe me. The fact that you will try to steer forum threads I create into directions that are completely auxiliary is childish and immature. I think it’s rather comical, in fact, that this is how our relationship will end: my revelation. Checkmate, I’ve known. The efforts you’ve made to lie, sneak, and cheat our relationship was nothingness. A truly empty, blank fallacy. I’ve known Shadowunleashed13. You will never trick me or anyone else again. Insolent worm.

2. SplashTheHedgehog.

You’ve all been waiting for this, so here we go. This is it. The revelation that you have all been waiting for is finally here. For as long as I can remember, the community has always noticed a conflict between Splash and me. I never intended for this to be spawned and never did anything to intentionally escalate it, aside from perhaps typing up this marvelous composition.
There are logs, everywhere, Splash. You can deny it all you want, but do not be as pathetic as Shadowunleashed13 was and is. I’ve seen them. All your declarations of hatred for me, my ways of conducting myself and the wiki, and my ascension to staffhood. I’ve had a somewhat secret source of Skype and chat logs set up for some time now so I could see everything that was happening, even whilst I was away. Pretty clever, aye? It made arguing with you over how you “truly do not have any distaste for me” even that much more hilarious and comical. Quite a con and card you are, aren’t you?
I still don’t know why you hate me. I honestly think it’s a childish rivalry of sorts. Are you still hooked on that one ban from two years ago? OH, BROTHER! Don’t flatter me with those thoughts, it’s disgustingly pitiful that could even still remember that enough to let it affect you.
For some reason, I think that you thought if you posted things in Skype, it would magically make things better. Clearly telling the community that you hate me is going to make things better! CLEARLY! I have not much to say to you but this, Splash: grow up. The world doesn’t give you people to gossip to about others. You think that solved anything? No. You’re pathetic, and I loathe your immaturity to sink so low as to think that slandering me and saying that you are deserving of positions I received would solve anything. How disgusting.
As sad as it is, Splash, I might even miss you, only because I know that you have very publicly stated how elated you were when I “left the wiki” some time ago. It is a shame to me that by leaving you receive some kind of victorious happiness from this. Guess what? Don’t. I’ve known you’ve hated me and have always regarded you as a child, and nothing more. A child who knows not how to solve his problems but by finding a mommy to run to and tell everyone about what an evil admin that nasty Bullet Francisco is.
I hope you grow up. I hope you learn one way or another, that this will never earn you anything in life. Not a penny, not a position, not a rank, and not a friend. Ta-ta.

V. Martyrship

I think that classifying myself as a martyr for the below reasoning is rather pitiful and lowly, too much for myself. Instead, I’m going to say it’s only one of many reasons why I’m flying the coop. Perhaps if I leave, then I can remove the one thing everyone hates: myself. SNN’s admins disapprove of me. If I can remove myself, then that’s one less problem to deal with. Perhaps by typing all of this, I can reveal the evils of this community, and how broken we are, how disgustingly hateful we all are.
We all love to hate each other. It’s drama, we crave it. We crave the excitement of having an enemy to battle with, and we are all evil people for having that attitude. I ask every one of you to stop this childishly disgusting attitude the moment you finish reading the upcoming ending of this essay of sorts. SNN is broken. The Heartless Manufactory does not operate and does nothing to solve inter-user relations.
Fix yourselves, or this community will burn down in ashes. Even though the encyclopedia was created by a community built out of a hateful, loathing community, I would hate to see it die as a result of that. Save yourselves, in debt to all of those who worked on this place. Over five years of fans, editors, and users have passed through this place—and we all have hated each other.

Redefine your future.
Save the future users.
Save the wiki.
For God’s sake… Save yourselves.

VI. Hypocrisy

I’m the biggest hypocrite of all, and I know it. By publishing this and leaving forever, I am a coward, and I am hateful. Perhaps by being the first to admit that, I can start a revolution.
More importantly, though, yes: I’m a hypocrite. Most importantly, though, I don’t care. These are my opinions on this place and my experiences with the community. Now you know. My publication of this composition is the antithesis of that which I preach against, and yet it had to be done.

VII. Conclusion

That is the end. I have removed me e-mail addresses from SNN. I will no longer monitor a watchlist or edit SNN More importantly, however, I will never edit a single page on this wiki again in my life. I also shall never visit either site again as long as I live. I will delete any e-mails I receive from an address I do not know explicitly. If you try to contact me on Skype, good luck. My nick has changed and you will be swiftly ignored. I will not read any replies to this essay. If you try to send messages through my close online friends, you disgust me, and they will not send them to me. Any further attempts to contact me beyond those aforementioned shall be thwarted by me personally.
This is the end.

You will never hear from me again.

Do not try to contact me. You will not succeed.
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